Heavy Days, Light Moments: Learning to Find Joy Again
Life has moments where everything feels like it's falling apart, and you're just trying to keep your shit together. We all know what that's like—the good, the bad, and the moments that test us.
The storm isn’t You
We've all been there. That moment when your coffee spills, your kid has a meltdown, your project deadline is looming, and your brain decides it's the perfect time to replay every single thing you have left on your plate.
But these moments don't define you. They pass for some. For others, though, the storm lingers. PTSD and trauma don't just fade with time.
Triggers can bring back emotions or experiences in ways that feel just as real as when they first happened. If this resonates with you, know that you're not broken.
You're carrying experiences that need space, care, and sometimes support from others who understand. Healing isn't about erasing the past, but learning how to move forward while honoring what you've been through.
Start at the center
Getting out of your own head makes a difference. Sometimes that means:
Sprawling out on the floor and just breathing for five minutes (even if my cat decides it's the perfect time to use me as furniture)
Writing down all the chaos in my brain, no filter, no judgment—just letting it flow onto paper
Reaching out to that one friend who just listens: no advice, no fixes, just presence.
Redefine your goals & routines
When shit hits the fan, your goals and ambitions can tend to take a backseat. But maintaining focus on what matters to you is imperative, especially during rougher seasons of life.
Create a morning routine that connects you with these goals. Pick 3 or 4 small actions that set a strong foundation for your day.
Spend 10 minutes planning your day around what actually matters: appointments, ideas you want to get started on, or anything that aligns with your bigger picture.
Feeling overwhelmed? Start smaller. Set a few bite-sized, achievable tasks that push you forward, even if it's just one step at a time. Progress is progress, no matter how small.
Workout those muscles
Resilience is a skill you build over time, like a muscle. And like any muscle, it needs consistent work and the right approach.
You can’t repress, you have to navigate challenges in a way that acknowledges what you've been through.
Whether you're recovering from a tough experience, dealing with ongoing stress, or just trying to manage daily life, these habits help build strength over time.
Start with your daily habits.
Sleep isn't optional, it's your reset button. Neither is moving your body or drinking enough water. These basics might sound obvious, but they're your foundation when everything else feels shaky.
Then, work on your mental game. This means:
Setting boundaries with people and commitments that drain you
Learning to say no without feeling guilty about it
Recognizing when you need help and actually asking for it
Understanding that setbacks are temporary, even when they feel permanent
Building a support system of people who get it
Remember the job interview that terrified you, the relationship you thought you'd never recover from, the project that seemed impossible? You handled those. And if you're facing something that feels insurmountable now, know that resilience is built through every challenge you work through, even the ones that feel impossible in the moment.
Growth happens when you take what you've been through and use it to shape how you move forward. It’s about adapting, learning, and continuing on, even when things feel heavy.
Tough times can make your story more interesting
Even when it feels impossible, it doesn’t hurt to try and acknowledge the positive.
Not in a toxic positivity way, but in a "well, that taught me something I didn't know about myself" way.
Those retrospective thoughts can help. But on the flip side of that, you don't have to be positive all the time.
If there are two things you take away from this:
Feel your feelings, acknowledge them, then focus on what you can control.
Remember that you’re collecting experiences, building strength, and probably helping others (usually without even realizing it.)
Thanks for being here, reading this, and doing your best. Sometimes that's all we can do, and that's perfectly fucking okay.
I love the idea of redefining the goals and expectations for not only life, but one's day. Intentionality goes a long way! Thanks for sharing Jake!
Frankly to accept all the experiences we go through has to be one of the more challenging aspects of being a human!